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DEVICES TO BE DESTROYED:

This area of the site is dedicated to the items that shall be destroyed at some point or other. They are the objects that deserve to be destroyed as they are completely useless, or completely shite.

1.COWS

I HATE MOTHERFUCKING COWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They stand there and they look at you, like, "I want to kill you and burn your body, you piece of shit." This makes me want to grab the nearest chainsaw to hand(Never too far away, and make beef steak the old fashioned way. Then I piss all over their bodies. That will teach them to look at me. Bastards.

2. TOASTERS

Toasters are even worse than motherfucking cows. The way I see it is that you put the bread in, go away, then come and there is toast, ready to eat, buttered, and on a plate. This, as I discovered when I tried to use a toaster, is not the case. You put the bread in, go away, come back, and the toaster will:

Spew toast at your head, breaking several teeth.
Get the toast stuck in the toaster, requiring the use of a fork in order to force it out, which is risking electrocution, and hunger
Set on fire, and burn your house, flat, dustbin, cardboard box and kill you. Don't worry about this though, as you will be dead, and consequently won't care.

3.TOILETS

The way that I see it, Humanity doesn't need toilets. We lived for thousands of years shitting in bushes, and I am proud to say that I do the next best thing. I dump in the books in the children's library. Well, books used to be trees didn't they? The looks on children's faces is so good when they open "Spot The Dog" and find a little sample of what it is really like to have to house train a puppy. Hahahahahahahahahah.

Anyway, toilets freak me out. They look like they want to bite you, then you sit on them, and plop plop plop, my arse gets wet. Requiring me to get my whores to wipe me clean. No one gets my bitches wet except me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

4.CHILDREN

I Hate Children. They are noisy, annoying, and should be killed at birth. 'Nuff said.